Domestic Abuse Is The Hidden Pandemic Amidst The COVID-19 Crisis

While safety protocols ask people to stay at home, a different calamity is taking place behind closed doors. Studies show that cases of domestic violence tend to increase during periods when families spend more time together.

Let’s go through some information on family violence and how the coronavirus outbreak is affecting it. We’ll also be going through what you can do if you’re a victim or what we can do to help.

Facts About Domestic Violence

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Domestic violence is an act of abuse that takes place between people in an intimate relationship. According to Blake Griffin Edwards, LMFT, “Domestic violence (DV) takes many forms, including chronic arguing and yelling, controlling behaviors, intimidation, threats of suicide or murder, threats involving weapons, and serious injuries.”

However, we can also take the term in a broader sense to include violence against children and relatives. These forms of abuse can be physical, verbal, sexual, or economic. Such can take place in both heterosexual and same-sex relationships. The people involved may be dating, cohabiting, be married, or merely intimately-involved.

According to the World Health Organization (WHO), one out of three women experiences some form of abuse in their lifetime. Despite most reports and studies focusing on women being the victims, men can also be the target. The number of reported cases may seem low, but most of these situations typically go unreported. This problem is likely due to the stigma surrounding the idea that men can be victims as well.

The Current Situation

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With the on-going health crisis, more people are at risk of experiencing domestic abuse at home. Countries such as the UK, China, and the US report that domestic cases have increased significantly since the beginning of the outbreak. The City of Jingzhou in Hubei says that reported cases have tripled in February versus that of last year.

There are several ways that the coronavirus outbreak exacerbates this risk.

First, quarantine protocols ask people to stay indoors as much as possible. Families should not go outside except for reasons such as purchasing food and medicine, going to work, and seeking critical medical attention. Being around the abuser more makes it more likely for individuals to experience acts of abuse.

Second, the stress that the pandemic brings can worsen conflict within families. The threat of illness has everyone on edge, and families are losing their sources of income. Such problems can bring about more considerable distress to individuals. Abusers may thus take their frustrations out on their family.

Third, victims may have less contact with friends and families outside who may offer them protection and support. In many cases of abuse, the abuser will typically try to cut off communication between the victim and loved ones. This action ensures that they won’t be able to seek help and leave the abuser.

Fourth, there’s lesser access to essential goods, forcing the victim to rely on the abuser. Protective measures limit individuals from leaving their homes, and many businesses also closed due to the pandemic. For these reasons, a victim may not be able to meet their needs on their own. This dependence gives more power to the abuser, which they can use against the victim.

Fifth, it can be difficult to access help as sources of aid may also be operating limitedly. Individuals may not be able to access hotlines, shelters, protection services, counselors, and legal assistance as freely as before. Thus, they will be unable to seek the necessary help that they desperately need.

What We Can Do

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Despite the added difficulty, there are ways we can help address the problem of domestic abuse.

For one, not all sources of help have closed down. Although the workforce may have decreased, there are still people manning hotlines and running charities. If you are experiencing domestic violence, try to reach out to these organizations for help.

Additionally, we, as individuals, can continue to offer up help during these trying times as well. As the abuser may try to cut off communication, it matters for you to be proactive about helping. If you know or suspect someone of suffering from domestic abuse, reach out. If your area permits it, pay a visit to where your relative or friend lives to check on them. If someone does ask for help, try to be as accommodating as you can. Offer your place as a temporary shelter, if possible. Further, try to call the authorities or a local charity to help provide additional help.

Summary

While many of us are busy dealing with the threat of COVID-19, many families are suffering from domestic violence. Several factors are putting many men, women, children, and others at higher risk. Despite social distancing measures, we should never forget to be compassionate during this pandemic. If you believe someone may be experiencing such, be proactive about reaching out. Try to connect with them or go to local authorities or organizations that are capable of helping.

The Best Self-Defense For Women  [Different Martial Arts For Women] 

 They say “chivalry is dead,” but nowadays it is less of women’s concerns. This world projects a lot of dangers even to the most peaceful people. Back then violence only shows when you look for it, but today, it shows up anytime, anywhere, and it could happen regardless of age or gender. Women are often believed to be weak in nature. It is general knowledge that they are physically incapable of defending themselves from attackers, especially when attackers are men. 

 

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  Continue reading “The Best Self-Defense For Women  [Different Martial Arts For Women] “

Women’s World – The Importance Of Self-Defense

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As a woman, we should consider learning some helpful techniques that can help us in defending ourselves. Not only it is essential in handling a very toxic environment, but it is also helpful making sure that there are no rooms for any kind of harassment. In dealing with danger, we must protect ourselves and prepare to battle our aggressor at all cost.

People are capable of hurting us, and it creates a sense of fear inside ourselves for that matter. It impacts us in ways that prevent us from living the best life. Sometimes, we even try so hard to master the art of kindness without considering what we genuinely feel. At some point, we see ourselves longing for respect and appreciation.

In a list of different occasions, we can become vulnerable in all sorts of danger. Those dangers can happen anywhere including inside our comfort zone. There are instances that even our spouses or significant others are capable of doing such violent actions that can drastically affect our mental and emotional aspects. In this case, there’s a need for proper orientation as well as knowledge to be able to know how we can manage to defeat an attack or abuse before it can even become a lifetime trauma.

 

Source: defense.gov

 

The Advantages of Self-Defense

Self-defense is significant in a woman’s balancing life. It helps in improving our sense of focus that allows us to control our mind and body. It supports a wide variety of advantages when it comes to our physical, mental, and emotional conditioning. It gives us the right discipline in addressing a stressful situation while managing to stay calm. It also builds our confidence and provides us with enough reason to think about our abilities, so we can directly apply the process to protect ourselves.

There are lots of negativities in our society, and the world is becoming an unsafe place for women all over the world. However, the knowledge for self-defense can give us women the benefit of having an alert mental and physical state. Also, it provides the necessary awareness of using our own body to escape and somehow predict harmful instances.

 

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Self Defense Influence Your Life

Self-defense is not something we use to bully or hurt people. From the word itself, it should become our primary strength in fighting against those dangerous people that try to hurt us. It can be at school, office, street, and even at home. Dangers are everywhere, so we need to understand the value of relying on ourselves in times of unwanted situations.

An attack can happen anywhere, so it is necessary to ensure safety precaution at all cost. Our ability to defend ourselves is an instinct that we need to obtain to refrain ourselves from the danger of human nature. If we don’t dare to stand for what we believe is right, we can never create an impact to the society. Being a woman, it is our primary responsibility to tell the world that harassment is never at all normal.

A Woman’s World: Ways To Avoid Danger

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If you’ve been aware of the news for the last couple of decades, then you probably know that violence against women is widespread in all parts of the world. A lot of women suffer from harassment. The crimes against women such as rape, sexual assault, molestation, eve-teasing, and murder, are only a couple of examples. With that said, all women must be aware of the different ways on how to avoid danger and master self-defense.

 

What Is Self-Defense?

Self-defense is the ability to protect oneself. It is the art of mastering a technique that is useful in repelling an assault. It could be a forceful kick, blocking a punch, pushing, etc. In most times, self-defense can be a form of martial arts or anything that uses counter-attack. Take note that every woman must use her physical ability to be able to save herself from unwanted danger so it will be necessary to take self-defense lessons.

 

Source: defense.gov

 

How Can Women Avoid Unwanted Danger?

  1. Always know the place you are in and make sure that you familiarize your way out in case of any unwanted circumstances. Avoid empty alleys and parking lots since those are potential places that an attacker can hide. Mark a nearest safe place that you can run whenever the situation gets out of hand. Look for people that can help you and remember to use the public as your defense.
  2. To reduce the risk of getting in danger, never go out alone with an unknown group of people. Always make sure that you spend time only with the people you know. Though hanging out friends is okay, it still doesn’t assure you of safety so always be aware of your surroundings at all times. Do not just trust anyone.
  3. Do not give your information to people you just met. Avoid risking your life by keeping your details with you. Avoid posting your location on social media. You can always share it on your wall, but not unless you are home safe and sound. Never allow people to follow your schedules.
  4. If you are in a relationship, allow your partner to know your current location. Send him detailed information about the place and the people you are hanging out with, or better yet, go out with him. Most attackers find it hard to do their crime if there’s an alpha male near their A Woman’s World: Ways To Avoid Danger target. So if ever you want to spend the night out, inform your spouse or significant other as early as possible.
  5. Learn to say no and avoid randomly accepting gifts from someone you don’t know. Though the intentions are good, always have the benefit of the doubt and check if receiving something is necessary to do. If you get stalked, do not be embarrassed to make a noise. It’ll scare your stalker away.
  6. By any means, always find a way to charge your phone. It is an essential tool that can help save your life. Keep away from draining its battery and make sure to turn on the GPS. On the other hand, do not get distracted by your mobile phone as well. It can also cause trouble when you spend too much time on it rather than paying attention to your surroundings.

 

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Women are prone to all sorts of danger so as much as possible, they should avoid any situation, which they feel are bad for them. Never doubt a woman’s instinct.

 

 

It’s Time To React – End Violence against Women

 

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In our society, women are prone to all sorts of physical, sexual, and psychological violence.

“Domestic violence and abuse are among the top precursors for developing depression and anxiety during adolescence and later in adult life. Sometimes the violence is between partners, other times it’s between parents and children and often it’s a family dynamic between all members of the household,” said by Mihaela Bernard, MA, LCPC.

“Sexual abuse can happen to both men and women in and out of a marital relationship. In a relationship with a narcissist, however, that abuse becomes magnified. For the narcissist, sexual abuse is used to control your behavior, elevate their feelings of superiority, reenact their fantasies (not yours), and paralyze you,” according to Christine Hammond, MS, LMHC.

“Psychological abuse leaves no visible marks and often remains hidden within families, romantic relationships, toxic individuals and groups, cults and organizations of various religious and non-religious orientations. Mental, emotional and spiritual abuse leaves lasting damage to a person’s sense of self, confidence and ability to navigate life successfully,” says registered psychologist Christiana Star.

These affect all levels and types of status in life. In unfortunate events, violence causes a deep emotional dilemma that sometimes leads to certain mental illnesses such as anxiety and depression. So how can we tell that a woman is under the pressure of harassment and abuse? Well, sometimes we can’t. That’s because we somehow tend to ignore most of the signs and think about everything as normal.

 

“Boys Will Be Boys”

We often consider men as the Alpha. It is where we condition our mind that men are capable of doing anything. Sometimes, due to the harsh reality, we don’t complain about it at all. We consider it a waste of time because we know at the back of our mind that a complaint will never stop them from doing what they are capable of.

 

“You’re My Wife, So Do As I Say”

When it comes to marriage and relationships, most of us women feel hopeless, especially in times when our partners tend to force us to do things we don’t want to. It somehow makes us think that marriage is an excuse to give our spouses an entitlement to do whatever they want to us and make us feel weak and vulnerable to violent actions.

 

“Hi Baby, Nice Ass”

It may utterly seem normal, but catcalling is not a sign of compliment. We sometimes create different judgments based on personal standards. In all honesty, we allow catcalling whenever the person meets our list of preferences, specifically the physical aspects. On the other hand, we tend to complain and consider the act as an abuse whenever that person does not quite reach our set of preferences.

 

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“She’s Such A Slut”

Some men call women all sorts of degrading names. It creates an impact on their personality that affects their perception towards men. However, some women tend to be okay with that. They somehow acknowledge the statement and think of it as something that is common to say.

 

“She’s Alone”

Any minute, any time, any day, someone can attack a woman whenever she is alone. That’s because men have this mentality that a woman is weak whenever she is all by herself. They believe that she doesn’t know how to defend herself. Sometimes, by being alone, they assume that she’s asking for harassment.

 

“It Was Just A Slap”

Any kind of physical contact without consent, in particular, is considered sexual harassment.  However, there are times that we let it slip because as what they say “it was just a slap.” Most women consider the excuse and ignore the act thinking it did not somehow harm them at all.

 

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Being a woman doesn’t mean we should let men take over our rights. The gender inequality and stereotypes are the leading causes of rooted violence, but that does not support the idea that we shouldn’t practice self-defense. It’s time to react, and the violence must end now.

 

Lover Turned Abuser – What Should Women Do?

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I don’t think women are ever asking for violence. “Generally, any behavior that uses one person’s power to exert control over another person’s physical and/or emotional safety is considered abusive. Physical abuse, sexual abuse and emotional abuse are all preconditions for people to develop low self-esteem, body image issues, relationship difficulties, anger issues, substance abuse issues, severe anxiety, depression, bipolar and other psychiatric disorders in adulthood,” according to Mihaela Bernard, MA, LCPC.

As much as possible, they want to be respected and valued, especially in the course of a relationship. When the abuse goes unnoticed and unchecked, it becomes normal. “No cause of domestic violence, however, justifies the actions of the abuser, nor should it be used as a rationale for their behavior. These possible causes are only to better understand why an abuser believes it is acceptable to abuse their partner physically, sexually, psychologically or emotionally,” according to Toby D. Goldsmith, MD.

Therefore, there is a need for intervention before it can become a life-changing trauma.

 

How Can Women Stop Violence?

 

  1. Learning to speak what’s on your mind is a good start to addressing an abuse. It will allow you to convey a message to your partner that his actions affect you. It will give your spouse or significant other an idea that he is not entitled to cause you so much pain. If you think your partner’s actions matter, so do your words. Be courageous enough to tell him that what he does to you can never contribute to your relationship or any of your development.

 

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  1. Once is always enough. When you try to tell yourself that your partner’s action is based on his emotions, then you are only prolonging the agony. It’s part of human nature to evolve along with the situation. Therefore, you are just giving your significant other a reason to hurt you continuously. Learn to evaluate the situation and make a better judgment. Provide yourself with fundamental reasons as to why you don’t deserve the abuse.

 

  1. Don’t be afraid to tell the world about what you are going through in your relationship. Sometimes, most women tend to get locked in a situation where they can no longer escape due to fear and pain. That’s how they become vulnerable to consistent abuse. Try to open up about your situation and seek help. Don’t wait for someone to help you – start helping yourself.

 

  1. Don’t let your emotions guard your focus in achieving a useful life-changing decision. You might consider an apology, but it must be delivered sincerely and not for the sake of patching things up. There is a tendency that the same abuse can happen all over again, so you better secure proper precautions. Always remember that your spouse or significant other is capable of doing anything so make sure you can manage to handle your feelings.

 

  1. The act of telling yourself that you are a strong person can help you overcome the violence. Do not allow your partner to ruin your psychological state. Keep in mind that your only way to get out of the abusive relationship is by leaning towards your strength. Believe in your abilities and make use of it. Focus on the positive side of your personality and never allow the negativity to consume you.

 

Source: defense.gov

 

Violence can happen to any woman at any time. You should be able to learn how to defend yourself and maintain a good mental and psychological state. Your relationship doesn’t have to cause you tremendous emotional pain because it’s supposed to contribute to your overall well-being. Be responsible enough to address your situation and evaluate small details of abuse so you can avoid it in getting worse. Learn to value yourself, so you can allow other people to give you what you deserve. “Depending on the nature of the abuse, its severity and length of exposure, substantial support and assistance may be required to heal the damage. But with focused inner work and appropriate guidance there is every chance of making a fresh start and become stronger, wiser and thrive in the future,” according to registered psychologist Christiana Star.

Warning Signs Of A Harmful Person According To A Psychiatrist 

The number of crimes committed against women on the streets is hard to overlook. Every day, women get robbed, harmed, or raped. It is alarming and saddening because women can avoid these things if they know about being street smart. “I think that all women need training in self-protection, be it model mugging, martial arts, shooting or guard dogs, because violence against women is a real and present danger, and it will never go away,” says Judith Eve Lipton M.D.

 

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Counseling Can Help You Raise Streetsmart Kids 

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Gone were the days when kids had the freedom to play around the neighborhood without their parents worrying about their safety. The only sign they had to go home was the sun setting, and momma knew they’d be home by then. Today, dangers are everywhere. Parents must always be vigilant when it comes to the safety of their children. 

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Ladies, We Still Need To Protect Ourselves

I know what you are thinking – it is 2018! Women should not have to worry about things like this! I am a strong independent woman, and no man can make me feel less than that! As much as I want to truly believe that women today are a lot safer granted that we are given more value and respect than we were back in the day, there are still people out there who haven’t entirely evolved from old ways.

Continue reading “Ladies, We Still Need To Protect Ourselves”